A friend trying to sell cleaning services sent this ad in.
It was a decent attempt at getting new customers, and there’s quite a bit he could do to make it even better.
So without further ado…
Let’s take a look at the original so we’ve got context to roll with:
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For crystal-clear vision
Your view through dirty windows quickly becomes clouded when dust, streaks, and water spots take over.
But don’t worry! With our professional glass cleaning service, we’ll make your windows shine like never before.
Our skilled cleaning artists will rid your glass surfaces of every flaw, whether it’s windows, doors, or facades. Whether it’s apartments, offices, or shops – we not only give you a clear view but also a radiant appearance. Trust in our magical quality and let us help you reveal the true brilliance of your spaces.
Did you notice that our prices are slightly lower?
This is an exclusive offer for the first twenty customers only!
We also offer you a special deal: After five hours of work, you can evaluate our services – with no financial risk! Not satisfied? You pay nothing. If you’re satisfied, we will continue to be your long-term partner with flexible contract terms.
Contact us now for a free quote:
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Visit our website for more information: https@@@@@
Trust in quality – trust in IZ Clean for all your cleaning needs!
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How NOT To Start Your Ads
If you want your audience to read past the first two lines of your ad, then remember this iron-clad rule:
You can do (almost) anything to your target audience except bore them.
Imagine telling someone:
“Hey, if you cut off your arm, you will bleed…and it will keep bleeding until you wrap it up!”
Or
“If you challenge a gorilla to mortal combat using your fists, you are going to be torn apart and you will lose. That’s not a good thing, is it?”
No.
We don’t do that.
We don’t bore our audience by explaining the obvious. Anyone older than five years old knows that these things happen.
If we want to write ads without being boring as hell, we’ve gotta nail the first few seconds.
How do we do that?
Start With The Conversation They’re Already Having In Their Head.
Our friend is selling services to people who are already “solution aware.”
A cleaning service isn’t a brand new concept to these people. They’ve heard about it before.
So doing this the right way would sound something like:
“If you’re looking to get your windows cleaned by a professional, we’ll be happy to help you out.”
Make it clear you understand first.
Because if you don’t match their awareness level, they’ll feel like your message isn’t for them and your best response will be the sound of crickets.
This is why we should always…
Keep It So Simple A 12-Year Old Could Understand
If you don’t know about the BAR test, it’ll come in handy when we look at the third paragraph:
If someone came to your front door, offered to clean your windows and spoke to you like that, you’d either:
- Tear two pieces of his sponge and use them as ear plugs to put an end to the noise.
- Or you’d say no, thank the kind gentleman and just do it yourself.
Cleaning artists? Radiant appearance? Magical quality?
Come on now.
For a split second you’d wonder whether he’s still talking about windows. We can’t blame him though…
…that’s what happens A.I does the writing for you. It sounds so non-human a deaf man could hear it.
Keep it simple and write like you speak.
Your audience appreciates it and they’ll pay attention long enough to hear your offer.
How To Sell Your Cleaning Services So People Actually Buy
Here are the key takeaways you can use to write better ads and bump up your sales numbers:
Meet your audience where they are – Are you solving a problem your target audience is unaware of or is it a known problem? Match their awareness level.
Keep it simple – Write like you speak and connect with your audience like a human being. No need for all the fancy words.
Make it easy to say yes – If you ask your audience for too much, they’ll do nothing instead. Give them a low-effort option and make it easy to say yes. Want them to call? Let them text instead and watch your response rate take off.
Use this information wisely.
Side effects may include more customers than you know what to do with.
Talk soon,
Asher
P.S. If you’d like to know how we can help you sell your services, get in touch here. We’ll take a look at your marketing and give you a 3-step action plan to get more customers.
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